partybarackisinthehousetonight:

never let your printer know that you waited until the last minute to print something and you’re in a hurry. they can sense fear

phantomthelabrat:

wrotten:

Sami Kuosmanen

At first glance I thought this was a herd of wild doritos

phantomthelabrat:

wrotten:

Sami Kuosmanen

At first glance I thought this was a herd of wild doritos

witch-of-sound:

dr-walrus:

callmebliss:

musica-mundana:

sit-back-relax-relapse:

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT KIND OF MUSICAL NOTATION THIS IS

That’s a shark

True scourge of the high Cs

I’M DONE

music jokes will never fail to amuse me

witch-of-sound:

dr-walrus:

callmebliss:

musica-mundana:

sit-back-relax-relapse:

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT KIND OF MUSICAL NOTATION THIS IS

That’s a shark

True scourge of the high Cs

I’M DONE

music jokes will never fail to amuse me

wykkyds:

ilikegirlsbro:

This fucked me up

this is pretty cute imo

(Source: constructionpaperandtears)

(Source: the-glitter-clit)

tarukai788:

thatonechick42:

littlecupcakenymph:

image

image

Oh.My.God. 

There ARE ACTUAL REAL MEN OUT THERE??!

THAT RESPECT WOMEN?

THAT ACCEPT “no” FOR AN ANSWER?

What.is.happening.

Quick, reblog this everywhere so we can learn and grow as a species!

the fact that this is shocking is saddening.

autieblesam:

ghost-of-bambi:

luckyladybutterfly:

velvetonions:

there needs to be a cooking show in which tv chefs go into student flats or houses and have to cook a full 3 course meal only using ingredients and equipment they can find in the kitchen

#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COOK ANYTHING WITH DORITOS AND INSTANT NOODLES#THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE A SAUCEPAN.

They do have a saucepan, but someone’s eating cereal out of it.

"Pasta. Why is there so much pasta? Who would ever eat that much pasta?"

(Source: queerodactyl)

jethrocane:

a pregnant woman goes into a coma

months later she wakes up, no longer pregnant

“you had twins! ” the nurse exclaims. “your brother named them”

“what did he name the girl?” the woman asks

“denise”

“that’s alright, I like denise. and the boy?”

“denephew”

For those of you who don’t know

licoriceplease:

First/second/third world terminology refers to whether or not a country was allied with the US during the Cold War. First world = allied; second world = opposed; third world = neutral

It literally has nothing to do with how “developed” a country is

These terms are outdated and we need to stop using them

supernatural-tardis:

i had a crush on this guy and i decided to pull a Pavlov on him by offering him whenever i saw him  this brand of candy he seemed to really like and after a while whenever he saw me he got excited for a second then you could see his expression shift to wondering the why the hell was he so happy to see me and i swear it was the evilest thing but also the most hilarious i made a guy like me by conditioning him into associating me to a candy he liked

spookyphernelia:

if you are ASEXUAL, you do not experience SEXUAL ATTRACTION.

if you are AROMANTIC, you do not experience ROMANTIC ATTRACTION.

if you are AROMATIC, you have a PLEASANT AND DISTINCTIVE SMELL.

The Signs and their Rooms

Aries: Messy, messy, messy. 'The chair' (you know which chair I'm talking about) has probably disappeared among all their clothes. Theory is that it probably fused to the ground.
Taurus: They have an ingrained connection with every single one of their posessions. They know you moved that sock 0.2 meters to the left don't deny it.
Gemini: Where's the floor? No one knows anymore. When they magically decide to clean up, it's like christmas morning when they find something they don't even remember having. Then, they get distracted by said thing and forget about cleaning up.
Cancer: Their room is their sanctuary. Probably going through an ant invasion because of all the food they eat there. Most likely to have a secret food stash.
Leo: Usually organized, though they can be lazy. They probably don't move enough to have a mess.
Virgo: Same as Taurus. Like the Eye of Sauron, they know everything that goes down there.They go into phases in which everything is probably color coded. They get lazy and give up a few weeks later when no one notices.
Libra: Probably unlivable until they decide Today is the Day and organize everything. They get bored halfway through and go back to feeling sorry for themselves because their rooms aren't pretty.
Scorpio: The walls are full with their interests. The mess control is manageable. Once you go in, it might be too dark to find your way out.
Sagittarius: Doesn't care at all about mess. Until they see someone else's clean room and their competitive gene appears. Soon it dies down and they go back to not caring.
Capricorn: Puts everyone else's to shame. Mostly, because like Leo, they are not naturally messy. Can be OCD about their space.
Aquarius: Their interests are also everywhere. They sleep next to their laptop. Their desk is no man's land.
Pisces: Clutter is their natural habitat. They probably don't remember the last time they turned on the lights. The windows have never been opened. An excavation team is needed to find the floor. Until people come over, then it's DEFCON 4 and everything is either organized or hidden.