What if you jizzed blood?
But only once a month. For a full week. While your balls ached and you felt sick the whole time.
Oh..
(via rosemel92)
What I love most about storytelling is that it makes you realize how subjective the truth can be.
One of the versions of the Medusa myth has Medusa raped by Poseidon, and thereafter turned into a monster by Athena. It’s a terrible, terribly tragic story.
I ALWAYS FEEL SAD FOR MEDUSA.
There’s also that medusa will never harm another woman.
(via fairyofthemoon)
[video]
Jack Dawson… Penniless artist who wins a ticket onto Titanic in 1912, attends a first class dinner, develops a taste for the finer things in life, pockets the Heart of the Ocean, survives the sinking, pawns the diamond, spends the following ten years building his wealth and in 1922 moves to West Egg as Jay Gatsby… Millionaire with a shady past and fear of swimming pools.
(via rosemel92)
how to have a flat stomach
- remove all of your organs
(via celticmagician)
15 CANS LMFAO
So this one time I had to fill out paperwork and I had to put my number on it and I knew it would be put on telemarketer lists so I have the the name Andy. Now when someone asks if they’re speaking to Andy I know they’re telemarketers.
(via celticmagician)
(via s33rofm1nd)
dumb story because i think i’m funny
we were watching a movie in school and there was a scene where this guy was driving over lava and they kept showing close up shots of the tires catching on fire and i started laughing and my friend kept asking me what was so funny and when i finally composed myself i took a deep breathe and whispered
‘hot wheels’
(via celticmagician)
(Source: nippled, via but-then-i)
Couldn’t find my dog anywhere until I noticed that there was something wrong with the couch
(via but-then-i)
mortimermcmirestinks answered: Fi as a Hylian.
(I’m pretty sure if Fi was human she’d be a warrior.)
(via patto-senpain)
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